Adams Autism Family

If you’ve been with us since 2017, you might remember the 3-minute video of Adam’s roadside meltdown that went viral on FB. We’ve reposted a shorter version of it today—especially for the many new followers who’ve joined us since then. Watching it again now, I realise how far we’ve come. I wasn’t as composed back then. We were still learning, still navigating unfamiliar waters. Today, we’re a lot more grounded. A bit more patient. And even Adam—his meltdowns are less frequent now, and he has a little more self-control than before. It’s been a long journey. And we’re still learning. But we’ve come a long way. Can’t believe this was some 8 years ago. Adam was 16. His prime as far as meltdowns were concerned. How many of you have seen this video before?

It’s been building up. The sleepless nights, the restless energy, the constant pacing, I suppose it was only a matter of time before something gave way. Tonight, Adam had a full-blown meltdown as I was trying to ease him into an earlier bedtime. He suddenly erupted hitting himself, slamming the walls. I rushed in to calm him, and in the chaos, caught a few scratches on my face and hand. Moments later, the team arrived — mommy, Arena, and Ara, each of us doing our part to hold space for him. It was one of those moments, heavy, raw, and humbling. But maybe, just maybe.. after releasing all that tension, he’ll find the calm he’s been missing. Maybe tonight will be the start of a gentler rhythm to sleep… For him. For me…

Adam slept at 10am and woke up at 5pm. Looks like we’re in for another marathon night ahead… 😅 But you know what? The house was unusually calm and quiet while he was asleep. Like… too peaceful. And then... he woke up. All systems go. Chaos resumed. But that’s our normal. And truth is, I’d rather have the noise… Because it means he’s here. #autism #asd #nonverbal #adhd #neurodivergent

Parents to children with Autism who are struggling with meltdowns, did you know? I didn’t. No one told me. I wished I had known this much earlier when Adam started to have meltdowns during his early teens. And even when I got to know some 10 years ago, I took a long time to adapt, adjust, and implement. I was still losing my temper when things got a little too intense. After all, Daddy had bad days too. Alhamdulillah, my prayers were answered. My unconditional love for my son prevailed.

Autism or not, when Adam does something wrong, we still need to be firm and correct him. Yes, he’s special. And I’ll admit I sometimes let him get away with more than I should. I give in, hoping to keep the peace… or maybe because deep down, I just want to make things easier for him and for me. Mommy doesn’t always agree with that. She reminds me that structure and consistency matters, and she’s right. For autistic individuals, firm routines and clear boundaries are essential. Not harsh. Not emotionally charged. Just calm, consistent firmness. It’s not about being strict. It’s about helping them feel safe and guided. Routine makes a habit. I’m better now than I used to be. I was guilty of spoiling him partly because I’ve always had a soft spot for Adam… and partly because I often chose the easier way out. But easier doesn’t always mean better. I am still learning, trying… #AdamsAutismFamily #AutismParenting #GentleButFirm #SpecialNeedsParenting

Stimming. Short for self-stimulatory behavior. For many autistic and ADHD individuals like Adam, it’s their way of processing the world, releasing energy, or calming themselves. It can look like hand flapping, bouncing, pacing, vocal sounds… and for Adam, it often means sudden bursts of hyper energy that light up the whole house. It may seem “too much” to outsiders… but to me, it’s just Adam “adamizing” I call it. Yes, he can get really loud. Yes, it can be chaotic sometimes. But as long as he’s happy, playful, and not in distress, I’m happy too. There’s no need to scold or try to stop these moments. Suppressing stimming is like asking someone not to breathe. Letting him stim freely is how I embrace his joy, his needs, and his way of coping with the world, more importantly for me to be a part of his world. Daddy says, “Let him be. Let him feel safe in his own skin. ❤️

Akhirnya sekian lama menunggu, bertahun, dan teringin sangat nak dapat kepastian, kami melakukannya di hospital Swasta. Alhamdulillah.

Adam tolong kasi stretch sikit seluar jeans mommy yg dah tak muat mommy... 😅 Mcm mcm Adam ni, pakai jeans mommy dia plak. Sabar ye mommy, Adam nak makan kat luar sempena celebrate mother’s day. Jom! Adam tried to put on his mommy’s jeans... 😅

Kalau korang macam kami, hari hari perlu ais batu... baik beli mesin buat ais batu ni... murah je... senang dan cepat buat ais batu... tekanlah beg kuning.

Kalau kucing kencing kat sofa, inilah penyelamatnya… vacuum basah, harga padu, kecil, ringan, tapi boleh tahan sedut… Check out di beg kuning.

5 years ago #onthisday Time flies... Life is short... Everyday’s a blessing... July is Adam’s birthday month...

Orang selalu tanya saya, “Apa akan jadi pada Adam bila saya dah tiada nanti?” Jawapan saya sentiasa sama, “Saya pun tak tahu… tapi yang saya pasti, anak saya sudah ada tiket ke Syurga. Dunia ini terlalu sementara. Apa pun yang terjadi, kita semua akan pergi juga. Siapa dulu? Kita tak tahu. Jadi selagi saya masih ada, saya akan hadir sepenuhnya untuk dia setiap hari, dan terus pegang amanah ini sebaik mungkin sebagai ayahnya. Cuba jalani hidup yang diredhai bersama dia.” InsyaAllah, bila saat itu tiba, kita tak perlu tunggu lama sangat untuk bersama semula. People always asked me “What’s going to happen to Adam when you are no longer around?” My answer is always, “I have no idea but what I do know is my son already has a ticket to Syurga.” Dunia is too temporary. Come what may, we all will go. Who first? We don’t know. So for every single day I still have, I will show up for him 100%, and continue to hold my amanah the best I can as his dad. Try to live a righteous life with him. InsyaAllah we wont need to wait for each other too long when the time comes.

Adam’s been having another phase of sleepless nights, four days now, and he only manages to fall asleep around 4am. I’ve come to accept that this is part of our journey. The thing is he wants my company when he’s up. He doesn’t realise it, daddy’s running on less these days. I used to be able to stay up and sometime even get some work done... now, not so much. My brain shuts down after midnight. But I’ve learned to take it one night at a time. One moment at a time. This isn’t about being a good father. It’s about doing what I still can. If not me than who? Mommy needs to wake up early for Ara. Generally I will sleep in till Adam wakes up. Tac-team so to speak. To any parent walking a similar path — I see you. You’re not alone. We do what we can, with what we have, for the ones we love most.

Adam… can daddy get a little break today? 😅 Maybe it’s just wishful thinking… 😁 But thank you, Adam, for giving me the chance to be the best old man I can be for you. It may never feel like enough, but I pray Allah eases our journey and makes up for all the shortcomings I have as your father. #adamsautismfamily #fatherhoodjourney #fulltimecaregiver #autismdad

Adam guna oil apa tu? Nak tahu? Dengar lah perkongsian Mommy Adam… 8 tahun oil ni membantu kami sekeluarga terutama Adam…❤️ DM kami kalau minta…

Kalau naik kereta dengan Arena, memang tak lepas berzikir dalam hati! 😂 Memanglah dia pandai drive, tapi mestilah saya BETTER! Selalu saya yang offer nak drive, tapi bila Arena dah besar, saya belajar untuk percaya dan bagi dia pegang stereng. Tapi kan… honestly, saya tetap rasa saya driver lagi hebat. 😎 So korang, #TeamSaya ke #TeamArena? Cuba komen sikit, nak tengok siapa yang ramai penyokong! #PeroduaAxia @Perodua Malaysia

Nowadays, the main goal is to find happiness and appreciate the blessings we have while navigating through the ups and downs of life with Adam. I like to call it “adamization” 😅. It took a long time, but embracing this journey has allowed me to be vulnerable and focus on the things and moments that truly matter, rather than getting lost in the chaos of comparison and expectations. Each day brings new challenges, but I now view them as blessings as well, and opportunities for self-growth and connection with Adam. I don’t have all the correct answers. I wasn’t built to be perfect. As we cry, laugh, rise, and fall, let’s find joy in the little things that once seemed insignificant. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, let’s do today while we still can. Life is too short to be petty about things we have no control over... or do we? Well I guess its up to each individual. I’m just more at peace this way, InsyaAllah. Alhamdulillah for everything.

We know pasta—and gluten in general—isn’t ideal for someone like Adam. But he loves it. And if it brings him joy, I’m going to let him have it. Watching him enjoy his food this much makes it worth breaking the rules sometimes. I’m not saying this is what every parent should do. But this is us—just a family that’s tired of always feeling like we have to follow every “should” and “shouldn’t.” We stay mindful, of course. We try to keep it moderate—maybe once or twice a week. But we also believe in not missing out on the little moments that make life feel full. Look at Adam. As an autistic young man, he doesn’t get to experience many of the things typical kids do. So if a bowl of pasta makes his day, who am I to take that away?

Thank you to everyone who gave gifts... Thanks for hanging out tadi... See you guys in the next one... ❤️ #tiktoklive

Been a while since I composed/wrote a song. Life took me away from the music industry but not from passion. Because of Adam, I quit... And because of Adam, I am inspired again... Syurga Itu Mahal — soon, InsyaAllah. Hope you’ll be part of this journey. Dah lama tak kompos/menulis lagu. Takdir bawa saya jauh dari industri muzik… tapi bukan dari minat yang dah terlalu lama terpendam. Kerana Adam, saya berhenti. Dan kerana Adam, InsyaAllah saya dapat inspirasi tuk kembali... Syurga Itu Mahal — tak lama lagi, InsyaAllah. Semoga anda dapat bersama dalam perjalanan ini. #SyurgaItuMahal #adamsautismfamily #theAdamProject #lagubaru #anaksyurga